Sunday, May 20, 2012

A lot has happened since I wrote last.  Time seems to fly by, maybe because I have been busy this past week.  Mother's Day a week ago and the kids took me to Red Lobster it was so nice.  All of Michelle's family and Scott's family were there.  Monday I went to lunch with Patty and Lolene to the Pastry Pub.  One of my favorite places in Cedar to eat.  Wednesday Michelle tended me most of the day.  We went to lunch and then her and Kamree took me to a movie.  Friday I had lunch with Mae, Linda, Betty, Minty and Virgina.  We have decided to spend a girls weekend in Mesquite and just talk.  Gaye, Joanie and Cathy fixed dinner Friday night complete with birthday cake and candles.  Bless their sweet hearts.  I love them all for all they do for me.  Saturday I took Kody and Kamree to Mesquite to watch Nate's ballgame.  Nice and warm, Scott and Lindy barbequed and Chris and Liz and their kids came over.  What fun to have friends like that. 

I got home about 1:30p because I stopped at Costco to buy some new tie downs.  I have no idea where ours are.  I'll probably find them one day.  I have so much to do and the weeds just keep growing.  Guess I'll have to try the weed and feed kind because the weeds spout almost as soon as I pull them.  It's hard with the fields on two sides and the wind blows constantly.  I didn't think I wanted to write on the blog because when I'm down it's too much like "poor me."  After such a nice week you would think it would keep me going.  But it's pretty hard to sit alone all day until bedtime.  I miss Mike so much sometimes I can hardly breath.  I know I am blessed and nothing can bring him back.  I just don't feel that way tonight.

I have a presidency meeting on Wednesday and I'm supposed to go to the temple with Patty and Lolene.  I guess I will have to postpone the temple trip.  We are going to Kanab next Friday to ride four wheelers.  Then Marrit is coming here to help me with the yard.  I am so looking forward to having them here.  I've just got to make it through this week.  Scott and Lindy are going to Provo to help Crissy move.  That will be a good thing for the kids, I guess they have found a better place to live.  I sure miss Crissy and love her so much.  Love all those grandkids, I don't know what I'd do without them.  Marrit posted a video of Brooklynn catching a fish, so fun.  Brooklynn reeled it in and said, "Oh he's so cute."  Well guess I'll end on an up-note. 
Love you all, Grams

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Moving on with the Blog
May 9, 2012


I have been unable to write on my blog since Mike's passing.  But blogging seems to be the best way to get it all down.  I have still been keeping a journal but I felt that it was too private to put "out there."  But tonight I feel like writing.  So here goes.  First of all it has been just over five months.  It's gone by fast and slow.  I have had days when I cried for days and days when I haven't cried.  The days when I don't cry are still far and few between.  But I am getting a little better.  A lot has happened, Marrit wanted to walk the Relay for Life in Mesquite and between Lindy, Michell and Marrit with a little tent decorating from all of us we had a pretty cute tent.  We raised $560.00 not bad for a bunch first timers.  We got a certificate for most people in the Spirit Round.  Pat and her girls were there, CJ and her daughter were there.   (CJ is a friend I met through Lindy)  She is Jail Commander and Highway Patrol Dispatch.  Shawn, Michelle and kids, Scott and Lindy and kids and Marrit and Brooklynn and myself were all there wearing our Colorado Rockies shirts.  We looked pretty cool.

Mike's (our) headstone is in and I really like it.  Good thing because I picked out  my own side.  Not very girly but I love it.  My side has has a Cedar tree and a four wheeler.  Mike's a buck and doe in the quakies.  In the middle is a wagon wheel with flowers which represents my love for old things and Mike's love for gardening.  On the back is the St. George temple with the kids names on it.  Today I took flowers out for the vases on the sides.  I looked all over town for a thing that fits on top of the stone to arrange flowers on but haven't found one yet.  I am very happy with the stone.

When I got home from Mesquite I unpacked and washed.  I was sure glad I did because I woke up at 7:30am puking and diareah.  I was so sick I thought maybe I'd better let someone know so I texted Michelle.  She was sick too and so was Kamree and so was Jaymie and then Nate got sick and then Scott.  I was so out of it I kept falling asleep and dreaming that I was fainting and I would call for Mike.  I dreamed it over and over.  When I finally woke up I thought, "oh good Mike will be home soon."  I mean I was reallly sick.  I hope I never get that sick again.

Yesterday Kody and Michell came down and Kody mowed the lawns.  He came back today and edged and spread rocks and helped me plant the barrals.  Bless his little heart, he worked so hard.  He is trying to earn money to buy a snow board. I could never have done all he got done.  I need to spray for weeds, sprays for bugs and pull weeds and pull more weeds.  I just want it to keep looking like Mike was here.  I want his to be proud of me and I will try to keep it up with everyones help.  Michelle has worked so hard pulling weeds.  I would have never got this far.  Scott and Curt are going to get a block fence.  The block is here, I just need the footings done. I am being patient because I know how hard my boys are working.

That kind of catches up so I'll quit for now.  Love to all Mom